how exactly I feel

Now.
I feel stress because I think I can't even handle a simple thing.
I feel lost because I don't even know what I can do sometimes.
I feel angry because I hate myself for being a lil useless & stupid most of the time, sorry if people around me felt that from me too, I didn't meant it on purpose I swear.
Purely, I just can't control how my feeling goes sometimes, I bet you all did experience it before or maybe not...
sometimes, I think by not being me is the best way of covering up my ugliness. Ahhhh, I envy pretty and flawless people. Random but who doesn't, right?

Jobless soon. I can't imagine what I'm going to do after that. I have so much in mind, but am I capable of it, is the problem im thinking about. I'm afraid to bring disappointment. Yes im fickle minded because I think of every possibilities and outcome there will be, who doesn't want to be successful right. I want but my ability has its limit. I know where I stand. I'm worried.

Yep I have soooooooo much in mind! Brain isn't so big to contain so many stuffs inside. Guess I'll just have to clear it bit by bit using my not-so-much cleverness. Hope I won't make a mess out of it (which I more likely will) :(

Oh congrats baby for passing napfa yesterday, he did well (:
-im sorry for all my nonsense sometimes, definitely not what I want myself, to be like this.
im trying too.

:(:(:( okay, breakfast & get myself buck up for work..